GUEST IN YOUR OWN HOME

Experiencing immigration and displacement taught you that you don't really belong anywhere. Whether through homelessness, forced moves, or immigration and refugee experiences you've learned that your presence is temporary, that you are rootless and that others decide whether you get to stay or go ➡️. Your survival strategy became: make yourself as small and unproblematic as possible so maybe they'll let you remain a little longer.

This gave you incredible adaptability 💪—you learned to minimize your needs to avoid being a burden, developed the ability to fit into any space without causing trouble, and became skilled at reading the intentions of powerful people. You're exceptionally considerate of others, rarely ask for anything, and have mastered the art of being helpful without taking up too much room 🪑.

But now, in your relationships, you struggle to commit fully because what's the point if it won't last? You've become so used to being like a driven leaf, without a place to call home, that you can't trust in permanence unless your partner is significantly more stable, has more financial resources 💰 or is more emotionally secure than you. When partners show their own vulnerabilities or struggles, you instinctively pull back from commitment. Deep down, you believe that people like you don't get to commit—that rootlessness is your natural state and only others with real strength can offer you the stability you crave but don't dare expect to find in yourself.