💔 What it means to have grown up with emotional abuse
Growing up with emotional abuse meant your household was dominated by screaming matches, tearful apologies, slammed doors, and passionate makeups—that emotional rollercoaster became your original template for what love feels like.
You may have learned that your parent's criticism and belittling were somehow "for your own good," teaching you that love and humiliation were inseparable. Your reality was constantly questioned and redefined, making you doubt your own account of events, memories, and feelings until you learned that your version of events was inherently unreliable.
You may have developed the expectation that partners will eventually turn on you, treat you unjustly, or make every relationship problem your fault. Even now, feelings feel too dangerous to express because they might be weaponized against you or dismissed entirely, leaving you constantly filtering your thoughts and expressions to avoid triggering negative reactions.